Bake Da Johnny Cake

Reyuda: You see my peas tree lately?

Sherica: No. What happun ta it? Don’ tell me it move!

Reyuda: Funny. You should see it, chile. Dat tree buckle right down wid so much green pigeon peas, it split. You know whut time of year it is.

Sherica: You mean you have plenty peas? Chile, save me some. I jus’ pray it rain so I can catch some rainwater. It does make da peas burl faster and does save gas.

Reyuda: We need ta save gas wid all der bakin’ fer dis yuletide.

Sherica: Yuletide? Don’ get fancy wid me. We does say Christmas roun’ here. Where you get off at?

Reyuda: You know we can’t offend our brudders and sistering dem who don’t celebrate Christmas.

Sherica: I understand. I don’t make a big deal about it merself cause after all, it’s jus’ one day. But yer know som’ting. Can you imagine singing “Mama bake the Johnny cake yuletide comin’?” Yuletide is for dem who does have yule log and need eggnog…

Reyuda: Dats true. We don’t need yule logs ‘cause we don’t have a chimney for Santa to climb down. And we don’t fool with eggnog too much because we gat switcha. I had some da udder day,you know, an’ I drank it without sugar.

Sherica: Without sugar?

Reyuda: Yeah man. I tryin’ ta lose some weight before Christmas.

Sherica: Before Christmas? Most people lose weight naturally after Christmas when they think of how much money dey spen’ on gifts, paintin’ da house, new furniture an’ tings like dat. More weight does come off if dey didn’t get enough presents or der right ones. It is a long way to der January payday.

Reyuda: Stop right dere. Trust me. I ain’ goin’ lose no weight for dat. I gat mer fruit cake stuff steepin’…

Sherica: I t’ought you never used ta touch dat stuff.

Reyuda: I’m still a teetotaller. My fruitcake tingum ma jig steepin’ in grape juice and I orderin’ a nutty, nutty one dat had der apple juice treatment.

Sherica: Dats all you losin’ weight for?

Reyuda: Well, on Christmas Day I start off wid mer devotions. I gat ter t’ank God fer Jesus no matter what day it is. Then I pray over my hearty breakfast of sour lime leaf wid fever grass tea .I might throw in some pear leaf fer ole time sake. Then, I have boil fish , yellow guinea corn grits and Johnny cake. Nowadays all kinda Johnny cake is around an’ you can even get der recipe from der internet. Der udder day I came across www.sawyerfoods.com. Dey have recipes an’ you can order yer peas’n rice , conch chowder, jams, grouper without being in der Bahamas! I does get der real McCoy Johnny cake though. And…

Sherica: What else?

Reyuda: You should see me mincing wid dat. I like ter leave some fer manners but not on my plate. I save some for snack time wid der fruits dem. It tastes delicious…scrumptious then. At dinner time…

Sherica: Let me guess. Green peas ‘n rice and der works.

Reyuda: Well, I am vegetarian so I will be modest. Mommy used ta cook a sweet pot of green peas ‘n rice. We used ta argue over der pot cake! After the meal, dere is dessert.

Sherica: Oh my gosh! Don’t tell me. You gat a stash of benny cake, peanut cake, der pink ‘n white coconut cake. All of dat is sugar. Yeah, you need ter lose some pounds in advance…before Christmas. Where yer switcha tree is?

Reyuda: Switcha tree? Shut yer mout’ girl! Don’t let no one hear you say dat! You mussy been hangin’ out wid foreigners too long.

Sherica: Where you does get switcha from then?

Reyuda: Switcha is a fruit drink just like der dilly splat an’ passion fruit ta do dat my brudder does make. Chile, dese drinks taste so good, dey does mystify errybody. I’ll tell yer what. Come visit me one day an’ we can talk Bahamian tings. Or, check the website regularly for Bahamian Tingum Ma Jig updates. If you wan’ see some tings try www.bahamas.com . Dat is som’ting else!